Mother's, Daughter's, and the Estrogen that Assaults them...

I remember it well. The year I turned eleven years old. My days were filled with hurt feelings and nights spent crying myself to sleep because of some perceived wrong done to me by a friend at school. One moment I was angry, the next I was carefree.  Looking back on it, I was constantly plagued by surging emotions that were tethered to circumstances.  Circumstances that were always changing.

Hormones. The word causes us all to nod our heads in feminine sympathy for one another. Hormones can turn a good day into a bad one and produce tears at the drop of a hat. Husbands rightly shudder at the mention of PMS and look on in bewilderment as the rise and fall of estrogen transforms a wife who yesterday had a sense of humor about her faults, into an over-sensitive emotional mess…and then back again.

Hormonal fluctuations can certainly affect our emotions but must we let them? In the past I have been far too quick to believe the enemy’s lie that I must act on my emotions, or even that I have no control over them. You know, “I can’t help how I feel.” While God gave us emotions He did not mean for them to dictate our lives when they run amuck.

We can control our emotions and they should not be used to justify sin. Our daughters may feel irritable and edgy at a certain point of the month, but that does not excuse unkind words or corrupt speech.

Truth Versus Reality

A kind gift we can give to our daughters is to communicate to them that our feelings often have very little to do with reality. We can instruct them now, when they are young, not to cater to their emotions in the midst of fluctuating hormones. If they allow themselves to be led by emotions now then how will this look in later years during the “big stuff” like a difficult pregnancy, a troubled marriage, financial emergencies or caring for an aging parent?

Hannah Whitall Smith penned these words:

We must choose, without any regard to the state of our emotions, what attitude our will will take toward God.  We must recognize that our emotions are only the servants of our will…

Our will can control our feelings if only we are steadfastly minded to do so.  Many times when my feelings have declared contrary to the facts, I have changed those feelings entirely by a steadfast assertion of their opposite…

Surging emotions–like a tossing vessel, which by degrees yields to the steady pull of the anchor–finding themselves attached to the mighty power of God by the choice of your will, must sooner or later give allegiance to Him.

(Incidentally, Hannah Whitall Smith had circumstances in her life that would have left many of us an emotional nutcase.  Her husband was an adulterer who was repeatedly unfaithful.  Two of her children died, one was unfaithful in marriage and ran off with her lover. Another child married an outspoken atheist.  Hannah herself suffered with painful arthritis.)

God has designed our bodies to have seasons and cycles. Every season has it’s challenges whether it be young girlhood, puberty, young womanhood, middle adulthood, peri-menopause and finally, menopause. But by God’s grace, we can fill our minds up with his truth when we feel hormonal storms approaching, and we can teach our daughters to do the same.

Scriptures to Mediate on When Your Emoticon App Doesn’t Contain Enough Faces to Describe You

No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. God is faithful, and he will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation he will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it. 1 Cor. 10:13
Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect. Romans 12:2
 to put off your old self, which belongs to your former manner of life and is corrupt through deceitful desires, and to be renewed in the spirit of your minds, and to put on the new self,created after the likeness of God in true righteousness and holiness. Eph. 4:22-24
Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say, rejoice.  Let your reasonableness be known to everyone. The Lord is at hand; do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God.  And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4: 4-7
Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things. Phillipians 4:8
God made our bodies. He understands how they work and things like puberty, menstrual cycles, pregnancy and menopause don’t catch him off guard. We can fix our  minds on Christ and He will sanctify our emotions and grant us peace.


<This blog post was shared with you from the amazing blog Raising Homemakers, by Bambi>

Prayers of the Rightous

Everyone goes through trials, and rough patches now and then. It's nothing to be ashamed of. Sometimes our prayers help us to avoid them. Sometimes not. It's the attitude we have when we go through them that matters most. 

Do you think if we are filled with anger or bitterness, or if we insist on complaining and blaming God, things will turn out good??? My answer? probably not. 

If we go through our hard times with thankfulness and praise to God, He promises to bring good things despite them, (James 1:2.3)

Maybe I'm the only one, but it has taken (and is still taking) quite a while to come to the above conclusion. 

A wife's prayers for her husband during these times may not change some of the things he must go through. after all If we never suffered, what kind of shallow, compassion less, impatient people would we be?

 But, I have come to notice that prayer can help him maintain a positive outlook of gratitude, hope, patience, and peace in the midst of it, and keep him from reaping the penalty of a wrong response!!! 

Isn't it refreshing to know that we have this power of prayer through Jesus? I think so!

I can't think of any trial that my husband or I have gone through that didn't grow us deeper in the things of God, even though it was miserable to endure at the time and we had little appreciation of where we were headed. But, as we prayed through every rough spot, and still do, we found (find) our faith growing and our walk with God deepening. When our attitudes are right, our love for each other also becomes stronger, and we grow even closer as one with our Father!

If you don't have a regular time of prayer with your husband, I encourage you to do so, if not nightly, maybe weekly! It will change your marriage, your life, and your walk with the Father! 

Pray for and with your husband, it is amazing what benefits your family will reap from it!

25 Ways to Love your Husband

If you ever feel that your marriage could be stronger or you feel your relationship needs a re-charge  pick one that works for you and have fun!!  I so believe that discovering ways to show love in YOUR SPOUSE'S LANGUAGE and re-discovering your FRIENDSHIP over and over again is what builds a strong marriage!  

1. CHOOSE TO ACT NOT RE-ACT.  Isn't it so natural and easy to react to others - to become offended when someone is offensive?!  To reflect shortness to someones being short or irritable?  You cannot ever change others, but you have the power to choose how you act and love.  Experiment with showing more love in the moment rather than just merely mirroring how they treat you - this is one of the hardest things for us humans to do.
2. MIRROR & Toilet MESSAGES.  Write a little love note on your bathroom mirror with lipstick or a dry erase marker.  Or if you really feel like being crazy and doing something totally-out-of-the-ordinary, write on toilet paper with a permanent marker and lay out message on top of the toilet water :)
3. SAY YOU'RE SORRY, before he does.  I love the quote by Ruth Bell Graham: "A happy marriage is the union of two good forgivers."
4. TELL YOUR CHILDREN WHAT YOU LOVE ABOUT THEIR DAD.  A lot.
5. DROP EVERYTHING.  Try putting aside your eternal to-do lists just for a moment, and give your husband your sincere, undivided attention.
6. INITIATE.   Researchers report that sexual intimacy is the #1 need of Men in marriage - or the #1 way that they feel loved. Interestingly, men feel most fulfilled and loved only when they feel their spouse is eager and also fulfilled.  So make it fun, try new things, initiate.
7. TEXT HIM Surprise him with a spontaneous, flirty text or a sentence about why you are so grateful for him.  Finding your own ways to connect during the day makes a difference.
8. START A HOBBY TOGETHER.    Find something you both would enjoy!
9. PLAN A DATE NIGHT even it is in your own home when the kiddos are asleep (but I love it when we actually leave the house!). It’s so important to have that time to fall in love all over again - just the two of you.  We usually keep it super simple and lots of times it doesn't officially happen - but any time together (without kids)  make a huge difference.
10. START A “LOVE JOURNAL” where you can write letters to each other, paste in notes you have both written, special memories, and such.
11.   KEEP YOURSELF ATTRACTIVE Maybe I'm the only one here, but I find it difficult to actually find time to shower and feel pretty each day- especially when I'm meeting the continual demands of my children!  Whether it's throwing on some makeup, or finding some cute clothes that are actually clean :), or getting your hair done - it doesn't always happen but it does wonders for how we feel about ourselves.  
12. BREAKFAST IN BED  a surprise breakfast in bed, that could be fun.
13. FLIRT WITH HIM It's funny how we totally flirt while dating, but once we're married we can easily forget to be FUN!  Just because you've snagged him, don't stop flirting.  Try to bring it back. 
14.  DON'T TRY TO BE HIS MOM Remember you are his wife, not his mother. Don't jump him every time he does something differently than you’d like.  We likely all need this reminder often. 
15.  TOUCH  Physical touch can translate into love for a lot of men.  So as you talk with him or pass by him.. think to touch him in someway. 
16. WRITE A FUN "LOVE NOTE".  just leave a note somewhere where he'll find it. leave random, funny post it notes around the house.  
17. GIVE HIM A MASSAGE.  I bet he would love a spontaneous head rub or go all out and give him a back rub with lotion.  
18. GRAB A KISS WHILE YOU WAIT Kiss your husband while you're waiting at the stoplight or in the food drive-through.
19. BE AWARE OF EXITS & ENTRANCES  As you and your husband say goodbyes and reunite again after a long day, be aware of how you show love during these important cross roads. 
20. TALK ABOUT HIS INTERESTS Bring up a subject that interests him and listen to him talk. Even if the subject doesn't interest you, enjoy watching him as he gets stirred up over the topic.
21. SLOW DANCE in the kitchen when the kids go to bed. Actually, maybe dance in front of your kids!
22. VERBALLY SHOW APPRECIATION IN FRONT OF HIS FAMILY.  When with his family, for example, share sincere appreciation for what your husband does or who he is.  
23. SURPRISE GIFT.  Surprise him with a fun gift of some kind that he’d really enjoy.
24. CALM DOWN FIRST, THEN TALK.  When you are in a moment of frustration, try taking some deep breathes, perhaps hold your tongue momentarily, and discuss it as soon as you feel more able to talk kindly.  It's easy for humans to say hurtful, non-helpful things if they just react instantly in a heated moment.
25. FIND SOME SANITY AT HOME. With four little one's, our house usually feels out of control :).  And I need loads of help to keep things somewhat clean and organized!   I do care about the environment of our home because it does affect EVERYONE, especially me and my ability to focus more on relationships.                                                                                                                         

Love your husband! Have fun enjoying one another! Be submissive and show him you want him, you need him, you are in so much love with him! 

Prayer Through Deficiencies

When I went to school it was a scary place, socially. In middle school I was a chubby kid, girls were cruel and boys didn't like me, so I kept to myself a bit, but getting good grades came pretty easy. I never have thought to pray about my children having the ability or motivation to learn, I thought it would be just as easy for them! I was dead wrong!

It has become clear to us as parent's that one of our children is quite a bit delayed in learning, speech, and even in some social areas as well. 

School work, and focus has always been a struggle for him. He has a lot of difficulty learning new things, and retaining them... it is frustrating for this homeschooling mama!!!

Lately in my prayer time I have been praying for total healing of all of the difficulties this little boy has. It is so hard to watch our children struggle, isn't it???

In one way or another we all have deficiencies. Thankfully , God makes up for them with His strength. The bible says, "Not that we are sufficient of ourselves to think of anything as being from ourselves, but our sufficiency is from God" (2 Corinthians 3:5)

That is SO true......

God has pulled us and this child through some really rough patches, and I am sure more are to come, and through all of this we are learning that true knowledge and understanding begin with and come from the Lord.

The Bible teaches us that knowledge begins with a reverence for God and His ways. And what a great knowledge it is. So great, in fact, it is a shield that delivers and protects us from evil. 

Our children, and their ability to learn should never be taken for granted. Even while our children are still in the womb we can pray "Lord let this child be knit perfectly together by You forever." 

I believe the sooner we, especially as wives and mother's, get a handle on our direct connection and communication with Christ, through prayer, the better!

Our prayers for our children will make a positive and permanent difference in eternity and here on earth, no matter what their age or deficiency!

Exhausting Perseverance

It's only been a little more than six years, and already the calm, orderly, organized, nap taking (for adults) days seem a distant memory. Does it feel that way to you?

As a wife and mother I feel as if I give every ounce of what I have to my family, yet the dishes are piled higher than the Eiffel Tower, the beds seem to go unmade, the same cup has been in the same place for at least two days now, and somehow the kids seem unable to grasp even the most basic forms of civilized conduct at times! These things are enough to really make me throw my hands up and shout, "I GIVE UP!!!"

But I don't, I won't, my family depends on me not to! I choose not to give up or give in to the feeling that it's hopeless. As I persist in my efforts to be a godly wife and mother, I know I will experience small victories along the way---in fact most days I already do!

Over time, I am sure these little successes will turn into much larger ones. 

I have to remember daily that, the Lord is watching "I know your deeds, your love and faith, your service and perseverance, and that you are now doing more than you did at first" (Revelation 2:19)

Most assuredly He will honor mine and my husband's persistent dedication to walking in the ways of Scripture.

Praying these words over my life, and your's tonight....

"May the Lord direct your hearts into God's love and Christ's perseverance" (2 Thessalonians 3:5)

Comfort Food

Doesn't this Mac N' Cheese look so yummy??? 

I haven't tried the recipe yet. Let me know how you like it.

Ingredients

Kosher salt
1 pound elbow macaroni
1 stick unsalted butter, plus melted butter for brushing
1/4 cup all-purpose flour
2 teaspoons mustard powder
1 teaspoon Worcestershire sauce (optional)
1 teaspoon hot sauce
1/4 teaspoon cayenne pepper
1 quart whole milk
8 ounces havarti cheese, grated (about 2 cups)
1 pound sharp yellow cheddar cheese, grated (about 4 cups)
12 ounces white American cheese, grated (about 3 cups)
1 sleeve butter crackers (such as Ritz), crushed (about 35 crackers)
2 tablespoons grated parmesan cheese (optional)

Directions
Preheat the oven to 375 degrees F. Bring a large pot of salted water to a boil. Add the pasta and cook until just slightly softened, about 6 minutes. Reserve 1/2 cup cooking water, then drain the pasta and rinse under cold water.

Meanwhile, melt 4 tablespoons butter in a large saucepan over medium heat. Whisk in the flour, mustard powder, Worcestershire sauce, hot sauce and cayenne and cook, whisking, until the mixture is smooth and slightly golden, about 2 minutes. Whisk in the milk and cook, whisking occasionally, until the sauce begins to boil and thicken, about 5 minutes. Stir in the havarti and all but 1 cup each of the cheddar and American cheese; cook, stirring, until the cheese just melts, about 1 more minute. Stir in the pasta, adding the reserved pasta water as needed to make a creamy sauce. Season with salt.

Brush a 9-by-13-inch baking dish with melted butter. Spread the pasta mixture in the dish. Melt the remaining 4 tablespoons butter in a bowl in the microwave; stir in the crushed crackers and parmesan. Sprinkle the reserved cheddar and American cheese evenly over the pasta, then scatter the cracker mixture on top. Cover with aluminum foil and bake until heated through, about 25 minutes. Remove the foil; continue baking until browned and bubbly, about 20 more minutes. Let rest 10 minutes before serving.

Prevailing Prayer

There are countless dangers in this world. Trying to raise children in this world can be utterly terrifying at times. To guide our little one's safely through the minefield of childhood is overwhelming at times, to say the very least! Pornography, drugs, sex, and violence are just some of the weapons that Satan uses in an attempt to rob our children, to gain control of our sons and daughters in their most vulnerable moments.

Rest assured my dear sisters, We will prevail! But, only if we continue to turn to the original source of truth and power.

JESUS CHRIST.......

On the night our Lord was betrayed He gathered His disciples in a vineyard and prayed for them, saying, "I have given them your word and the world has hated them, for they are not of the world any more than I am of the world, My prayer is not that you take them out of the world but that you protect them from the evil one" (John 17:14-15)

In the same way, the world hates your children if they belong to God. 

Although we may wish that the precious little ones in our care could be spared from the evil influences in our immoral, corrupt society, God has a purpose for their lives on this earth... I preach this to our children daily.... 

We must yield to His plan. Our task is to pray for our kids, to reach them in the ways of God, and to protect them as long as we have breath in our lungs. 

Each morning I wake up a few hours before the kids do. I have my coffee, I read, and I pray for them.... I can not stress how truly important this prayer time is! I have two things I pray for daily, among other's! 

I pray for their little hearts to have a longing and a desire for the things of God (honor, obedience, knowledge of scripture, service... etc.)

I also pray for their protection. Not just the physical protection from harm and danger, but their spiritual protection. 

Evil is on every corner, in so many homes, schools, even churches. It's our job as parent's to intercede for our babies, praying for them is a must! 

I am sure you pray for you children, even if they are still in the womb... but, if you don't have regular prayer time for them, I challenge you to start! Even if it's just two minutes. It could make a difference in eternity.

I get in the way

" I will be his father and he will be my son." 2 Samuel7:14

A Father's Job is to train his children to take on the world. 

The moment will come, all too soon, when your kids will walk away from the comforts of home and begin their own exciting journey into independence and adulthood. To prepare for that transition, your children desperately need your love, leadership and guidance throughout their growing-up years. 

A Father's role in raising these little one's is much different than a mother's, but, of course of no less importance. 

The impact and responsibility of dads in raising our babies cannot be over-estimated. Father's are in the very center of God's design for families. 

I get in the WAY!!!!!

I push sometimes, to raise my children without regard for my husband, the very one who had part in helping these kids come into this world! 

I am wrong.

I caudal sometimes, not wanting my husband to play too rough, or speak to firmly to our boys. THAT'S WHAT THEY NEED.... rough play and  firm godly discipline! I am doing our children a disservice if I get in the way of that.

I am wrong.

I ignore what he says sometimes, simply because I don't think what he is saying or doing is the right thing. I do this without talking to him, or making sure that what I am saying or doing is pleasing to him and our Lord. 

I am wrong.

I cut with my words sometimes. This one hurts me deep into my core. I have struggled with having the gentle quiet spirit mentioned in God's word all of my life........... all of my life!!!! I say things that are so harsh to the one I love most on this earth... my groom! I not only speak harshly but, I sometimes do this in front of our children. If they see mommy speaking to daddy in this manner why shouldn't they feel free to speak this way??? If I continue this, I will send them on a path full of hurt, disobedience, and guilt.

I am wrong.

I could list many more things, I'm sure! 

Maybe I am the only one who struggles with some of the things I mentioned above, but, if not... will you give these things to Christ? Allow Him to be your guide. Talk to your husband. Do not stand in his way. Let him lead you, your family, and your children. If you have boys, let them be rough, his firm manly discipline is exactly what they need..... let it happen! Don't try to be a god and control everything! God's all powerful, and believe me, He's got this... ;) 

What are you struggling with??? Are you letting your husband be a daddy?

Can I pray for you???

Dreaming Big

Ahhh, the dreams, the saving, the Internet surfing, the "when is the best time to go" questions....... all for the sake of.............................................................................

Walt Disney World!!!!!!!

I grew up in a very rural town in Florida, this town is about 2 hours from Disney!

My family went a lot more that most families get to. To say I love Disney World would be an understatement! This place is way more than magical. When you step onto the streets of this enchanting world something happens that can not be described. 

I want so badly for our four children, and even my husband to experience this wonder....and re-living the magic of my childhood would be amazing (especially to see it through the eyes of our little ones)

As you can imagine, getting out of the house to run errands is a challenge with four babies underfoot, let alone traveling to Disney. So, right now, we wait... We continue dreaming.... We save what we can...... in hopes to travel as a family to Disney World one day. 

-------side note-------- I do realize there are many things that come before this lovely place on the list of "things to do"................... Simply a lavish dream I have for us! 

What's your dream????

A Purposeful Calling

Contrary to the popular thinking of Christianity today, the Lord did not reach down and save us from sin and death so that we might be merely happy, healthy and wealthy that is not our purpose. Those who teach this have invented another gospel! They portray a false Christ---the god of this age rather than the God of the Bible.

A gospel without the cross is no Gospel at all........

I, as a wife and mother, I long to serve my family and other's, but, sometimes I listen to the lies of the evil one. The thoughts I listen to often are "this wife and mother thing, is a joke. You have no purpose." 

or "you have a degree, what in the world are you doing home... you are making NO DIFFERENCE." 

There are many other lies, but the two above are the ones told to me more often than not. Most days I choose not to listen, but some days I succumb to the thoughts in my head! It's then more than ever I have to lean on Christ. He has a purpose for me, and this wife and mother thing is one of the greatest purposes under heaven.

God's purpose for us, from the moment He created us, has never changed. We have always been destined for the throne----created to rule with the One who created all things for himself.

I love serving my family! I love catering to my husband! I love seeing unselfish, kind, and loving fruits burst forth from our little one's! Seeing God's handy work, and knowing HE created me for a purpose, is refreshing. This truth gives me strength, it gives me passion to wake up and do it all over again! Christ has given all of us a purpose.

What is yours???

Essential Rest

We all need rest. Rest is essential to thrive, to cope, and even...... to live! 

If this said rest is essential, why do we, as wives, mother's and friends get so little of it?

It shouldn't be just a convenience that we squeeze into our schedules or an indulgence for those who aren't willing to work hard. We should have regular times of quiet and stillness, it is essential for our spiritual and biological well being! 

Do you know (I'm sure you do) many members of the animal kingdom and plant species will hibernate or become dormant through the winter months in order to survive. We mothers humans, have more of a struggle  remembering or even acknowledging these natural rhythms of life. 

God knows all about our overzealous tendencies.

The maker of the universe rested. He created us to rest, in fact He commands us to set aside a day to rest each week, to pray, and rejuvenate. 

If God himself thought it fitting to rest for ONE WHOLE DAY (after creating the world by the way) Why do we think we have the power to keep going, without rest or stillness to hear from our Lord???

In today's "hurry up" culture, families try (including my own) to do it all---- work, school, church, social events, and an endless array of swim meets, acting classes, and piano lessons. Life begins to feel like a runaway train. 

Stop in your tracks today! Spend time with the one who created you to rest, rejuvenate, and hear from heaven! 

"Come to me, all you who are weak and burdened, and I will give you rest." (Matthew 11:28)

The Master is calling you, my friend, to rest. Won't you hear His call today?

Honor In the Home

Does it seem odd to require someone to honor us?

If it's really honor,  shouldn't they do it with out being told? Well, this may be true concerning other people in our lives, but not our children. They MUST be taught!!!

The bible says: "Children obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. Honor your father and mother which is the first commandment with promise that it may be well with you and you may live long on the earth" (Ephesians 6:1-3). Is it not scary to you that, if our children do not obey this command of the Lord, they could not only be cut off from all that God has for them, but, the lives of these precious little ones could also be shortened? The fact that we, as parents, can affect the length and quality of our children's lives, is reason enough to pray, instruct and discipline them!

Rebellion WILL surface in your child at one time or another.

 Be ready to meet the challenge with prayer and the Word of God, along with correction, discipline, and teaching.

Don't be intimidated, dear friend,  by a rebellious spirit. Jesus is Lord above that, too. 

A LONG break...

What a whirlwind. Over a year has gone by and not one blog post from yours truly! 

I'm Back.... With stories to tell! 

I can't wait to share with you all.